!!

Welcome to Two Track Music

Guest/Visitor, welcome to the Two Track Music forum area.  If you're not yet a member here, just click the Register link above to sign up.  It's free, quick, and relatively easy.

Once registered, you will be able to post anywhere in the forums, create topics, ask questions, show off your music, and collaborate with other members to create a new song or musical piece.

You will also be able to view post attachments, which are usually songs in progress or completed songs.  And, you'll have access to our TTM Articles section, which contains a variety of articles on software, hardware, mixing, mastering, and many other topics.  The forum Search option will also be available to you once registered.

Two Track Music is a somewhat 'laid back' community.  Just some good musicians and song writers hanging out, and having a good time.  We're not a high pressure or fast paced site, we just enjoy kicking back and making some music, and having fun while we're doing it.

If that sounds like your kind of place, please join us.  We'd love to have you in the mix.  And yes, pun intended... ;)

Additional Menu

TTM Shoutbox

Last 15 Shouts:

 

Joom

Today at 05:49:39 PM
I assume everybody knows that once you click play on CB's video that you can scroll to the right and click the full screen icon to watch it in full screen mode...
 

Joom

Today at 05:48:15 PM
Good one, Bob.  People were dancing and having a good time.  That's a great band you have there...
 

agradeleous

Today at 09:46:34 AM
Nice one CB !
 

combobob

Today at 03:43:36 AM
I played 3 shows in December with a band I was in in the 80's-90's. I put together a short video of footage my son took on his iPhone:

 

Joom

January 18, 2019, 08:28:55 PM
Spent the day on computers at a couple hotels, and now have to head to the neighbors to fix their WiFi.  I charge businesses, but I help all the local people for nothing.  They seem to like that...
 

Joom

January 17, 2019, 03:50:46 PM
Well, TTM might be, but probably without me...  ::)
 

agradeleous

January 17, 2019, 03:44:36 PM
You didn't answer the " who's going to be around the longest " part 🤣
 

Joom

January 16, 2019, 11:44:17 AM
Music Banter is two years older than us, and KAE is a year or two older.

And when I said "music website" below, I meant "music forums"...
 

agradeleous

January 16, 2019, 11:36:59 AM
Who's got us beat and who's gunna last the longest ? Lol
 

Joom

January 16, 2019, 11:01:18 AM
I wondered if we might be the oldest music website still around, so I checked.  We're not the oldest, but we're one of the oldest.
 

buster

January 16, 2019, 01:50:30 AM
Happy birthday to us  :-* :-* :-*
 

Dino

January 15, 2019, 11:52:52 PM
 :D ;) :o ??? :-\ :)
 

Joom

January 15, 2019, 02:43:49 PM
I forgot yesterday - Happy 14th anniversary.

5,114 days of standout music, good times, and hanging out with great friends...  :)
 

agradeleous

January 13, 2019, 09:48:28 AM
Yeah , I just haven't seen that many at one time .
 

Joom

January 12, 2019, 12:20:06 AM
Just checked, and I see the latest guest was from France...

Show 50 latest
Welcome, Guest. Please login or register.
January 20, 2019, 06:02:29 PM

Login with username, password and session length

Author Topic: Well, I thought it was funny...  (Read 77 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

Online Joom

  • I Am The
  • Administrator
  • Producer
  • *
  • Join Date: Aug 2012
  • Posts: 3898
  • Karma: 6
  • Old, tired, and ready to jam...
    • View Profile
Well, I thought it was funny...
« on: January 13, 2019, 05:43:06 PM »
FYI.....younger people probably won't get this.  Unless they're really into old music.

I just heard about a guy who walked barefoot most of the time, which produced an impressive set of calluses on his feet. He also ate very little, which made him rather frail and, with his odd diet, he suffered from bad breath. This made him a super calloused fragile mystic hexed by halitosis.

Okay, now I'm curious, who got that one?  ::)
A few quick and dirty cheaters from the old days, just for kicks...... www.twotrackmusic.com/joomcheats

Online way2lon

  • Original
  • Producer
  • *
  • Join Date: Oct 2013
  • Posts: 929
  • Karma: 5
  • Just hangin' here at TTM
    • View Profile
Re: Well, I thought it was funny...
« Reply #1 on: January 13, 2019, 05:48:50 PM »
I guess Dick Van Dyke didn't? :P
What a pity we can't know in advance who the spoiling minority are!

Online Joom

  • I Am The
  • Administrator
  • Producer
  • *
  • Join Date: Aug 2012
  • Posts: 3898
  • Karma: 6
  • Old, tired, and ready to jam...
    • View Profile
Re: Well, I thought it was funny...
« Reply #2 on: January 13, 2019, 06:24:47 PM »
A few quick and dirty cheaters from the old days, just for kicks...... www.twotrackmusic.com/joomcheats

Offline buster

  • Original
  • Manager
  • *
  • Join Date: Oct 2013
  • Posts: 388
  • Karma: 2
  • Just hangin' here at TTM
    • View Profile
Re: Well, I thought it was funny...
« Reply #3 on: January 14, 2019, 12:41:05 AM »

A frog goes into a bank and approaches the teller. He can see from her nameplate that her name is Patricia Whack.

"Miss Whack, I'd like to get a $30000 loan to take a holiday."

Patty looks at the frog in disbelief and asks his name. The frog says his name is Kermit Jagger, his dad is Mick Jagger, and that it's OK, he knows the bank manager. Patty explains that he will need to secure the loan with some collateral.

The frog says, "Sure. I have this," and produces a tiny porcelain elephant, about half an inch tall - bright pink and perfectly formed.

Very confused, Patty explains that she'll have to consult with the bank manager and disappears into a back office. She finds the manager and says, "There's a frog called Kermit Jagger out there who claims to know you and wants to borrow $30000, and he wants to use this as collateral."

She holds up the tiny pink elephant.

"I mean, what in the world is this?"

The bank manager looks back at her and says, "It's a knick-knack, Patty Whack, give the frog a loan. His old man's a Rolling Stone."

Online Joom

  • I Am The
  • Administrator
  • Producer
  • *
  • Join Date: Aug 2012
  • Posts: 3898
  • Karma: 6
  • Old, tired, and ready to jam...
    • View Profile
Re: Well, I thought it was funny...
« Reply #4 on: January 14, 2019, 11:00:09 AM »
The bank manager looks back at her and says, "It's a knick-knack, Patty Whack, give the frog a loan. His old man's a Rolling Stone."

 :P :P ;D   Another cool one, Buster.  Wish I had time to sit around and think these things up...  (-!)
A few quick and dirty cheaters from the old days, just for kicks...... www.twotrackmusic.com/joomcheats

Offline papaG

  • Too fat to fly....
  • Original
  • Producer
  • *
  • Join Date: Sep 2012
  • Posts: 1389
  • Karma: 6
  • Just hangin' here at TTM
    • View Profile
Re: Well, I thought it was funny...
« Reply #5 on: January 15, 2019, 02:06:35 PM »
:P :P ;D   Another cool one, Buster.  Wish I had time to sit around and think these things up...  (-!)
He comes by it honestly Boss.
Too much time breathing Regina air will mess up your head. They actually have a thing down there called TTSSW. Mostly only affects displaced warm blooded creatures like Aussies. Commonly referred to as "What the hell were you thinking leaving the heat for this crap?" syndrome.


There might be a pharmaceutical  solution for the symptoms but I haven't heard of a cure yet. Sorry Buster :(









Offline buster

  • Original
  • Manager
  • *
  • Join Date: Oct 2013
  • Posts: 388
  • Karma: 2
  • Just hangin' here at TTM
    • View Profile
Re: Well, I thought it was funny...
« Reply #6 on: January 15, 2019, 07:32:50 PM »
They actually have a thing down there called TTSSW. " syndrome.
  :(

?????

I have to ask mate or I'll spend all day trying work it out. 

But I can't take credit for the joke, it's older than my time in Regina. I  pinched it just like many of my tunes.  :P


Offline papaG

  • Too fat to fly....
  • Original
  • Producer
  • *
  • Join Date: Sep 2012
  • Posts: 1389
  • Karma: 6
  • Just hangin' here at TTM
    • View Profile
Re: Well, I thought it was funny...
« Reply #7 on: January 15, 2019, 07:35:45 PM »
TTSSW. Trying To Survive a Saskatchewan Winter syndrome


 ::-> ::-> ::->

Offline buster

  • Original
  • Manager
  • *
  • Join Date: Oct 2013
  • Posts: 388
  • Karma: 2
  • Just hangin' here at TTM
    • View Profile
Re: Well, I thought it was funny...
« Reply #8 on: January 15, 2019, 11:25:27 PM »
Thank you, I did, but 20 years later I'm still thawing out.    :o 8)